City Rabbi Goes Country

This striking image of “offering a hand” to someone reminds me of the challenge we face to make our synagogues and programming much more “welcoming.” Hospitality - hachnasat orchim - literally begins with “offering a hand”…a handshake on a Shabbat eve, for example. I am often amazed at how many people can walk into a synagogue lobby and never shake the hand of another person. Oh, we are doing a better job of installing “greeters” in our places - but more often than not the greeter only “hands out” - bulletins or prayer books. I would love to see a dedicated greeter who only offers her “hands out” to make human contact with another with a warm, sincere handshake.

Moreover, once one gets past the greeters, how many people experience the “offering of a hand” in the sanctuary itself? Not many. That’s why I love what a number of rabbis now insert during the service - an opportunity to turn around to someone nearby and offer a handshake and a greeting. The churches call this “passing the peace.” If every rabbi in North America did this for three minutes during the upcoming High Holy Days, we would change the “experience” of the holidays for many of our three-time-a-year attendees.

There is another meaning to “offering a hand.” Since my mother (may she rest in peace) died in July, I have been attending daily minyanim. A steady stream of new mourners and those observing Yahrzeit arrive almost every day. The leader of the minyan I attend does an excellent job of “offering a hand” to these folks…but I’m shocked at how few of the “regulars” take the initiative to welcome/engage the new people. There is, of course, the “ritual” of new mourners walking into Kabbalat Shabbat at the conclusion of “L’kha Dodi” while the congregation welcomes them with the traditional words of comfort. But, it would be good to alert the regulars in daily minyanim to be extra sensitive about the welcoming of mourners.

As for our good friend, Jamie - the Adventure Rabbi - what a stunning privilege to have God’s world as your sanctuary! I highly recommend Jamie’s book for its insights into how we can bring the spirit Rabbi Jessica discovered into our urban/suburban settings.

A reflective Elul to all…and an early shana tova u’metuka!

Ron Wolfson